From Denise's Journey:
I think the first thought people have after hearing the words, "You
have cancer" is, "Why me?" The truth is, for many of us, there is no
answer to that question. And it doesn't really matter why or how. You
have to learn to accept that it just "is."
expected to have cancer of an sort, but especially not breast cancer. No
one in my family has had it, so I'm immune, right? Wrong! OK, so I have
it. But I will fight it and I will win. I intend to share my thoughts
and feelings with you all. And my journey through the crazy, busy world
of tests, doctors and treatment.
I should have started
this earlier, but I have had computer problems including no internet at
home, and two non-working computers. I am now officially blogging from
the library's computer. Thank goodness for the library. It is my
sanctuary. I scooter (mobility scooter) a mile each way to and from the
library on every day that I have off from appointments, and even some
days after appointments. It's summer, and the Summer Reading Program is
underway, so when I am home, I spend much of my time reading.
I am being positive about my plight. I am not going to let cancer get to me. I decided not
to do a lot of research. I made a conscious effort not to look at
statistics. I think we can get bogged down with too much information and
too many numbers. Statistics are just that, statistics, averages. It
does not mean that you will die. I look at
it this way: Either I will survive or I won't. there are only two ways
about it, and I am going to do whatever I have to do in order to
Am I An Experiment?
A few days ago, I went for "chemo training." You know, what will happen,
what to expect, that sort of thing. I was told I would be on a combo of
chemo and Herceptin for five months, then surgery to remove any cancer
that survives, then seven months of Herceptin alone. My oncologist told
me I would be on chemo for a year with only five months of the Hercepin.
So, which is it? I don't especially like my oncologist, don't feel that
she's listening to me or my concerns. I told my friend of the treatment
plan, and he said that protocol makes no sense, chemo is never given
for such a short time. Which leaves me wondering, "Am I just an
experiment to them?"